one seriously pissed off cat

Contributor: Salvatore Vuono

Meyles sodded off to Melbourne for 3 days this week and left me to start my new job without him (sniff). And so the cat gets sick. I didn’t know he was sick until this morning I heard that unmistakable sound that sort of sounds like slow knocking.... I raced down the hall but he barfed everywhere just before I left for work on the carpet, and also chunky bits on the tiles as I tried to move him. He hardly ever does that. I cleaned it up and went off to work. When I came home he seemed fine. And then within 30 minutes after eating, I heard it again.... and this time it was on the tiles, thankfully!

I rang my sister who breeds cats – Ragdoll ones – and asked her advice. She said three things:

1. Worm him
2. Check him for ticks – don’t forget between the toes and in his ears
3. Check his ears for ear mites

The easiest thing was to check his ears, which I did and they were clear. I did a half-baked check for ticks, and I am yet to complete this (when I can get near him again). But it’s been ages since he was wormed, so I went to the supermarket and picked up some worming tablets. Previously we’ve used a paste, which he hates so much, that I decided that tablets would be over and done with. [Insert sarcastic laugh.] Of course being such a hefty mongrel, I needed two tablets because each one does up to 5kg of pussy-weight.

It occurred to me briefly to wait till Meyles got home late tonight to try and give him the tablets. But feeling rather confident in my own abilities I figured I’d seen Meyles do it often enough and it looked easy. I mean, how hard can it be? Not only that, but the cat was hungry and I had to give him this medication on an empty stomach.

So I got him and positioned him between my knees, facing away from me. Unsuspecting Hugo cooperated beautifully for the first tablet. Easy! The second tablet however, proved more difficult. Hugo had wised up considerably in the short space of time between tablets, and after several goes at it there were bits of white cat-spit and gooey wet tablet fragments all over the floor! Plus the cat kept trying to escape to the other end of the house. By now I was committed. I had to finish the job or else the medication wouldn’t be effective. The phone started ringing. I ignored it. I prized open his mouth and shoved in the tablet again while his tongue pushed it out. Finally had to hold his chin up for ages waiting for him to swallow. He wouldn’t swallow, but started chewing! Fair enough. Chewing is good. I kept holding his chin. His eyes looked at me during this time with rage and I knew I had to keep the chin up until he swallowed. After what seemed like ages, he eventually gave a gentle swallow. There were bits of white tablet-cat-spit frothing out of his mouth and though no more pieces of tablet escaped, gobs of spit did.

He is hiding in the garage under the car and feeling like a total victim. Now I am considering how to win the cat’s trust back.

Have you done this? What tips do you have? Click ‘here’ and give me your tips.